What did you have for lunch?

Each day I go to work at Mountainside Elementary as a Reading Aide. I love it and I love the experience it is giving me. Part of my time there, I am on "duty" where I get to be outside during the Lunch hour. I really enjoy that part as well. I like it for many reasons. I love seeing my own kids during the day and seeing them interact with the other kids. I also love being a problem solver. I scope the grounds always looking for that one individual that stands out to me as needing a little extra attention. It could be anything, from not being included with a group of kids, waiting patiently for a turn, sitting on the side all alone, etc. I really love reaching out to these kids. One young girl in fifth grade has stood out to me every since I have started working there. She is so beautiful and dresses very stylish. Each day at recess, I watch her walking around the playground talking to herself. Every once in a while I see her trying to fit in to a group, each time the group walking away from her. She has cried a few times and sat off by herself. I look at her and think "what is so wrong with her that nobody wants to be her friend?" I have passed by her and actually sat by her as she cried and helped her feel better, but that's not enough. Well, it eats at me each day that I see her. The fifth graders are the last ones called in during the lunch recess, so when all the other grades have finally gone in, she hurry and snags a swing and sits there all alone. Well, yesterday I seized the opportunity. I went and sat on the swing next to her and asked here every question that I would think of. "What did you have for lunch today?" "What did you do over the weekend?" "Where do you live?" "How many brothers and sisters do you have?" "Do you play the piano?"etc. You get my point. I asked her everything that showed an interest in her life. I wanted to know more about her. Ten minutes we sat there. I don't know if she thought I was an annoying Aide or not, but I do know that someone was paying attention to her and knew that she existed. To me that was what I was trying to do.
Today I saw her on the swings again. I sat by her and this time she started the conversation. " We talked until time to go in.

See, she sounds and looks like she has a great life and she has every reason to be happy, but I know that in some areas of her life , that she is not.

My point is this. I know that on almost all blogs, it shows the happy and perfect days and events of every ones life. I need to vent for this post and be not as positive. Surprise! My life is not PERFECT!!!!!

Looking at her, I am reminded of myself. I may look like I have it all or put on a good front, but inside I am needing that question asked to me. What did I have for Lunch? What did I do over the weekend?
It seems like each of us search to find those in need, but neglect to look right in front of our faces. Do we know what is really going on in each others lives and do we know how people are feeling? I see all the good we all are doing and I love it . Don't get me wrong, keep sharing all the fun times and things that we have accomplished, they are great to share. I just want us to keep in mind that what you see as being beautiful and happy, might have a big empty, painful and lonely area inside that just needs some attention.

I don't know if anything I say or do makes a difference and I probably will never know, but I would surely hate myself if I could make even just one day happier for another and I chose not to .

Look inside your own family and make sure you are asking those simple questions. It's the little things that make one feel like they are important. By knowing and really listening to the small things, the big things probably wouldn't occur.

I needed to vent- I apologize. I am not looking for comments, I just needed to voice my thoughts. They have been close to the surface and I needed to let them out.