I recently (December 31st) was in a Mountain Biking Accident in St. George and I am still recovering.Yes, I wore my helmet for two days while biking. I took it off while taking some pictures of the others and then I stupidly decided to get on my bike to take it back down the hill to the car. All it took was one incident. I am not sure how I did it. I think I squeezed the brakes too much ( new bike, not use to the more sensitive brakes) and I flew over my handle bars and smacked my head fast and hard on the ground as my bike followed behind me landing on top of me. I am having a hard time moving my right arm and shoulder due to my muscles being pulled and my bones being bruised. Along with my shoulder injury, I have a good noticeable head injury. We took a CATSCAN and multiple X-rays of my chest, arm/shoulder and knee. They all came out okay. I am just bruised and scraped.
I am already a very self-conscience person. I admit that I am unhappy about many things about myself and to have this new mark/scar to draw attention, I have had a really hard time being around others and have yet to go out of the house. I received three layers totaling 25 stitches from the my brow line on up to almost my hair line. We asked for a plastic surgeon to do the stitching and I hope in time that it will fade and be less noticeable. I hestitated even sharing the pictures. There are a few more graphic ones, but I have a hard time looking at those. They show the wound open all the way to my skull.
A friend of mine shared her thoughts to my concerns of how people were going to look at me now and how I felt the scar was going to draw looks. She told me that those that love me will not be looking at the scar, it won't even be there. It brought comfort at the time and I hope that is true. I don't want to be a topic of conversation or an object to be pointed at. I hope that I am loved enough that I can be looked at in the eye and made to feel beautiful regardless of my scar. I sound selfish or maybe "vane", but until it is you, it would be hard to understand. I do see the hand of God in my accident. I could have so easily been taken from this earth as my children stood by watching. My sweet Ada and Avery were traumatized. I hurt listening to them crying and their worries. I am thankful for our friends that were there that saw the need to take them away and get them distracted. They helped us a lot during this time. I was given strength to endure it and I pray for continued strength to endure the challenges ahead both physically and emotionally. I am grateful that I can walk, I can talk, I can be a mother still.
Life is short, don't risk it by not being
careful and grateful for what we have.
I know it is ironic that I post the pictures and talk about it when I don't want the attention. I guess I told myself that people are going to see the scar eventually and hopefully they can understand by my post how I am feeling and how I want the scar to represent strength, not ugliness. I want to be "Alison", not the girl with a scar across her head. It will take time for me to be comfortable again and I pray that I heal well and that it will all work out.
I am already a very self-conscience person. I admit that I am unhappy about many things about myself and to have this new mark/scar to draw attention, I have had a really hard time being around others and have yet to go out of the house. I received three layers totaling 25 stitches from the my brow line on up to almost my hair line. We asked for a plastic surgeon to do the stitching and I hope in time that it will fade and be less noticeable. I hestitated even sharing the pictures. There are a few more graphic ones, but I have a hard time looking at those. They show the wound open all the way to my skull.
A friend of mine shared her thoughts to my concerns of how people were going to look at me now and how I felt the scar was going to draw looks. She told me that those that love me will not be looking at the scar, it won't even be there. It brought comfort at the time and I hope that is true. I don't want to be a topic of conversation or an object to be pointed at. I hope that I am loved enough that I can be looked at in the eye and made to feel beautiful regardless of my scar. I sound selfish or maybe "vane", but until it is you, it would be hard to understand. I do see the hand of God in my accident. I could have so easily been taken from this earth as my children stood by watching. My sweet Ada and Avery were traumatized. I hurt listening to them crying and their worries. I am thankful for our friends that were there that saw the need to take them away and get them distracted. They helped us a lot during this time. I was given strength to endure it and I pray for continued strength to endure the challenges ahead both physically and emotionally. I am grateful that I can walk, I can talk, I can be a mother still.
Life is short, don't risk it by not being
careful and grateful for what we have.
I know it is ironic that I post the pictures and talk about it when I don't want the attention. I guess I told myself that people are going to see the scar eventually and hopefully they can understand by my post how I am feeling and how I want the scar to represent strength, not ugliness. I want to be "Alison", not the girl with a scar across her head. It will take time for me to be comfortable again and I pray that I heal well and that it will all work out.
15 comments:
My sweet Alison, you will always be
thought of as a caring and loving
person. I know this has been a tramatic experience and you are
struggling with the inability to
do all you want to do and are
worried about the outcome of your
accident, but I know without a
doubt that our Heavenly Father was
there protecting you because He
has many more plans for you. Dad
and I are so grateful that you were
not hurt worse. I know all will be
well with you and time will take
care of your wounds and you are
loved for yourself and all you do
for others. I know it is hard to
accept help from others, but that's
why they want to help you because
they care about you. Remember, when
we serve or help others, we are
following in our Savior's footsteps
We all love you for who you are and
nothing will change that. You have
many friends and family members who
want to help you, we want to show
you our love for you. The Lord will
bless you and teach you through this experience. Love you much
Love Mom
You will always be Alison, one of the choicest daughters of our Father in Heaven. I have felt that since I saw you draw your first breath and nothing will or could ever change that. You will heal and your body will repair it's self with some tender care and the help of good doctors. Doctors do wonders these days and the scar will eventually not be very visable. In the meantime, let it be a sign that you are strong and active and that you love being with your family and live life to the fullest. We thank our Father in Heaven that you were not more seriously hurt and I'm sure you are grateful to still have the opportunity to raise your sweet children as you have done so valiantly in the past. One of the greatest compliments ever given to us is :"You are Alison's parents,"
We are so blessed to have you in our lives and we shall forever be grateful for that honor. You touch the lives of so many in your ward, at school, and wherever you go. That is just how you are, always thinking of others. You will be in our prayers and the prayers of many and you will heal and be back to your active caring life style in record time. We are here to help you and your family in any way we can. I'm so sorry you were hurt, but knowing you, you will use this experience to gain faith, show gratitude, and perhaps be a little more cautious all the time. We all have our moments when we forget to do what we know we should.
JUST REMEMBER, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT. NOTHING WILL EVER CHANGE THAT.
We love you very much and so do many,many more.
We will be out often to see if we can help out and show our never ending love for you.
Love you forever,
Dad
Of course we all will still love you this really does not change who you are! We think you are amazing. On the new cars movie Nater talks about his dents and scratches and how he would never remove them because they are filled with memories of good times with people he loves. So when you see your scar you need to think of a fun trip spending time with your family and friends. Be proud of your scars they show you are a true women who can take a fall and still be standing. love christy
I second all of the comments above, especially Christy's...love that Mater!
Trials are hard -- they make us better people if we let them. Hang in there, time heals all wounds, inside and out. I can testify of that.
I love you.
Oh my goodness Alison! Who cares about your battle wound! The important thing is that you are ok. That is a miracle. You are tough, and the scar will fade in time. If later it still bothers you you can always sport bangs :)
I am glad you are ok!~!!!
Alison, I don't know if you remember me from when we went out to eat but I wanted to relate my story to you....hopefully it will make you feel better. 3 weeks before my sophmore year I was in a bad car wreck and had over 100 stitches in my face and arm. I was so self conscious when school started and was so worried about all the stares I would get. People were surprisingly very nice and the stitches actually made for good conversation starters. The scars eventually faded and people say that they don't even notice them unless I bring them up. And if people do notice them it is a good opportunity for me to talk about my experience and how I should of died but luckily didn't. Maybe yours will be a good conversation piece to help people realize that they need to wear a helmet. Maybe your story will help save someones life one day. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I was very impressed with you when we went out to eat and no scar is going to change that about you. You are an amazing person and don't let anyone make you feel differently. I am glad that things weren't worse and that you are doing ok. Hang in there!
I forgot to leave my name...this is Rhonda Hoth. :)
Love you Alison, sorry you had this happen. Thanks for letting us know what happened. We love and care about you. Remember, no matter what this crew loves you and we are all glad you are ok.
Love,
Rene
Alison,
I'm so sorry!! Jen was telling me about it. I know your worried about the scar but I'm just glad it's just a scar! You could have very easily broke your neck flying over your handle bars like that and ended up in a wheelchair or worse. I would also think that where it was a plastic surgeon that stitched you up, it should heal very well. I think over time it will get less and less noticable. Remember down in Vegas when we were comparing C-section scars...Yours was barely visable and mine was still nasty looking and no plastic surgeon stitched that up:) Besides, you are way too hard on yourself. You have no idea how many people including myself are envious of your gorgeous body. The things that you find unattarctive no one else even sees. They are too busy being critical of themselves. Scar or no scar... You are beautiful!!! I'm just glad you are okay!! Also, my Dr. was telling me about steroid injections to help my c-section scar heal better. Maybe go a consult with a plastic surgeon around here and see if something like that could help. I hope you get feeling better (((HUGS))) and prayers sent your way
So glad you posted this story. It does help us all understand what you are going through. It does make everyone realize what a tough woman you are. And yes we are glad that it was only stiches and not a broken neck or something worse. Like everyone else said, you are always going to be beautiful, no matter if you have a scar or not! ANd I love what Mandy said, everyone else is so critical of their own flaws that no one is going to be looking for yours. I had two moles removed off of my face, by a plastic surgeon,a few years ago, because they were growing. And the scars have gotten better over time. They healed super fast! SO glad you are doing better. Love you!
Your scar will heal with time and it will not be that bad after a while. You just fit in with the rest of us now. I've got that scar under my chin that people notice (especially when I don't shave) You are still beautiful and will always be beautiful. The beauty that matters you already have.
Love you
Philip
Oh Alison, I'm so sorry this happened. I'm so glad that you'll be alright though! No matter what you'll always be beautiful. Phillip is right when he said the beauty that matters is what you are and already have! Your in my thoughts! Love ya!!
How scary Alison. I'm so glad that you are alive and healing. You are gorgeous, inside and out! A scar can't change that. :)
"You will receive unexpected support over the next week. Accept it graciously."
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